So, you’ve decided to write your own wedding vows! Make it easy on yourself and read my awesome tips before you begin! The secrets to nailing your vows!
Before the wedding day…
Shift your mindset.
Don’t get caught up on the word “vow” as that word itself seems to evoke unnecessary stress and anxiety.
Think of your vows as a sweet love note that you are writing to each other to tell how you feel about them, how you will support them in marriage, and what you are looking forward to in your lives together as a married couple.
Authenticity speaks volumes, and it will make it easier to naturally recite your wedding vows when the time comes.
Don’t wait until the last minute to start writing your vows. I would suggest writing them a few weeks in advance.
Often, the month before a wedding involves finalizing multiple details for your big day, and the last thing you want to be worried about is your vows. You will still have time to adjust them if needed, and practice reciting them.
Practice makes perfect.
If you are writing your own vows, practice reading them out loud. Writing for reading is much different than writing for speaking.
Some words or phrases may be awkward when recited. Spend time reciting your wedding vows out loud so you can keep your tongue ties to a minimum.
For additional practice, recite your vows in front of a mirror, to a close friend, or even recording yourself to playback and listen.
I often audiotape myself practicing a ceremony beforehand so I can listen back to it and discover parts of my ceremony where I can improve.
Visualize the moment.
Close your eyes and visualize the ceremony beforehand.
Take in all the small details of the moment in your visualization.
Where are you standing? What does the ceremony location look like? What are you wearing? Who will be there with you?
On the wedding day…
Speak directly to your partner.
Remember this is not a play, and you are not performing in front of an audience – you are reciting heartfelt promises to the person you love most in the world and your friends and family are there to witness this and celebrate.
Hold your partner’s hands, look into their eyes, and talk to them.
They’ll only be about six inches from your face. You don’t have to project your voice, and you do not need to impress any member of the crowd.
You just have to be in the moment.
Remember to breathe.
Manage your wedding day jitters through breathing. While you are standing up there and feeling nervous, remember the power of three deep breaths. Inhale through the nose – out of the mouth for one breath. Then, inhale through the nose and imagine the breath coming from your shoulders.
This will help you release tension.
For the third breath, inhale and exhale and imagine the breath coming from your belly button.
This will help you to relax so that you can really be in the moment as you recite your wedding vows.
Embrace your emotions. Many couples are worried about crying while they are reciting their vows.
Go ahead and cry!
We’re human after all, and if there’s any day of your life that it’s okay to be emotional; it’s your wedding day.
All of your closest friends and family will be there to support you, and so will your spouse.
Sometimes I even get emotional as the celebrant!!!
It’s okay to cry and embrace your own emotions.
When in doubt, remember that your guests all love you and are there to celebrate with you, not to judge if you stumble over your words or begin to cry or even forget your own name.
Simply hold your partner’s hands and draw strength from each other.
And there’s some secrets to Nailing Your Vows!
Written by me – with some help from from Wedding Wire